I've just a view small notes:
 * Page 2: "As shown in the graphic, ...". You should point to a reference number: "As shown in graphic 2.1, ..."
 * Page 3: Assign the graphic a subtitle and a number
 * Page 3: "Cluster Grids, Collaborations Grids and Data Center Grids"...sounds familiar. You're not using any 
references to other papers. Is this a usual procedure in OGF documents?
 * Page 4 (sidebar): "pilot gird in 2003" -> "pilot grid in 2003"
 * Page 5: "Data Center Grids span 1 or more" -> "Data Center Grids span one or more"
 * Page 8: Assign the table a subtitle and a number
 * Page 9: Assign the graphic a number
 * Page 11: Point out what SAS stands for